In august of 2024, I was at my mom’s family ranch in Williams, for my cousins wedding. Leading up to the trip, I kept telling my family how excited I was for all of us to hike the Grand Canyon together. With my mom’s family living so close to the Canyon, I went there a handful of times as kid, and I was so excited to experience it again with everyone. However, the night before the big hike, of course the family drama struck. Which led to no one wanting to get together at the crack of dawn and hike the Grand Canyon in the middle of August. I was so upset- was looking forward to this for MONTHS. And adults acting like children was going to ruin it? Frustrated getting ready for bed that night something hit me that I am actually fully capable of going to the canyon by myself. So that is what I did.
I woke up at 4:30 AM, my heart racing as I drove to the canyon to catch the sunrise. Doubts crept in—was this really a good idea?? I mean I am a 23 year old, that definitely could be in better shape, and I have listened to enough crime podcasts to know this is a dream scenario for serial killers. But nonetheless, I did everything in my power to set myself up for success- shared my location with my family, used hiking app, and packed my bag with all the essentials (which included pepper spray just in case). And on the morning drive I decided if I did end up in the trunk of a mans car at the end of the day, at least my last view on this earth would be the most beautiful. This still was so out of my comfort zone. I was (and still am) struggling with my independence and doing things for myself. For years, I found my identity in other things/people. My identity was my 4 year relationship, my job, my family, etc. My identity was never just me. I felt stupid for thinking I could even do this- hike alone with my thoughts for hours?? But then I made myself really think “Why am I doing this?”. And the answer was simple- I am dong this for myself.
As I pulled up to the canyon as it still was dark I found a spot where a few other tourists were to experience the sunrise over the canyon. Also pro-tip, if you get to the canyon before sunrise, you can get into the park for free! Who knew?? Anyways I found a spot to be able to take in the sunrise. There where quiet whispers all around me in so many languages. People from all over the world there to experience the same thing. Isn’t that amazing? That natures beauty can bring people together. No matter what religion/race/age, nature has a unifying impact on the world. As the sun began to rise, vibrant shades of orange filled the canyon, and a hushed awe enveloped us all. In that stillness, I felt a profound connection to something greater than myself. It had been a challenging year, and I had wrestled with my faith, but this moment was a reminder of God’s power. The same Creator who sculpted the Grand Canyon also crafted me—a thought that still humbles me.
The peace I felt as the sun broke over the horizon fueled my excitement for the solo hike ahead. This was truly a liberating experience—something I wouldn’t have believed possible a year ago. I’ve never been prouder of myself.
As I trekked on mile five, the sun beating down and my adrenaline waning, the voice in my head urging me to turn back grew louder. But I embraced a new mindset that I still carry with me: it’s a privilege to feel this kind of pain. It’s a privilege to have legs that can carry me to the canyon’s edge, allowing me to witness its majesty firsthand. It’s a privilege to have eyes that appreciate the intricate beauty of nature, from the vibrant rock formations to the expansive sky above. Even the ache in my heart reminds me of the love I’ve experienced.
Solo hiking the canyon became a pivotal moment in my life, reshaping my perspective and deepening my gratitude for every experience—both joyful and challenging. In that vast silence, surrounded by towering cliffs and the endless sky, I discovered a sense of clarity I hadn’t felt in years. Each step I took on the rugged trail felt like a declaration of independence, a reclaiming of my identity as I navigated the ups and downs of the journey. The struggles I faced, from the physical exertion to the mental battles of self-doubt, became a testament to my resilience.
As I paused to take in the breathtaking views, I realized that the beauty of the canyon mirrored my own journey. Just as the layers of rock were shaped over time by the forces of nature, I too was being sculpted by my experiences. The challenges I had faced—the heartbreaks, the moments of uncertainty—had all contributed to the person I was becoming. In that moment of reflection, I felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude for every twist and turn that had led me to this point.
I found a profound connection to the world around me, recognizing that I am part of something much larger. The vastness of the canyon reminded me that my struggles are not isolated; they are part of the shared human experience. Nature’s beauty, in all its forms, has a way of grounding us, reminding us of our place in the world. As I stood there, with the sun rising higher and casting golden light across the landscape, I felt a renewed sense of purpose. This hike was more than just a physical journey; it was a celebration of my strength, a moment of self-discovery, and an embrace of the independence I had long yearned for.
Ultimately, solo hiking the Grand Canyon was not just about conquering a trail; it was about conquering my fears and embracing the unknown. I returned from that hike not just with memories of stunning vistas, but with a deeper understanding of myself and a commitment to continue exploring—both the world around me and the depths of my own spirit.